Thursday, February 12, 2009

How to Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

How to Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With
Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer at Passing Cars.
See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't DisguiseYour Voice. !

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want
Fries with that.

4. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks . Once Everyone has
Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions,
Switch to Espresso.

5. In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write ' For Marijuana'

6. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks you
get.

7. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious
face.

8. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.

9. Sing Along At The Opera.

10. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their
Party Because You have a headache.

11. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!'

12. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot,
Yelling'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'

13. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, 'Due To The Economy, We Are
Going
To Have To Let One Of You Go.'

And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity

14. PICK UP A BOX OF CONDOMS AT THE PHARMACY, GO TO THE COUNTER AND
ASK WHERE THE FITTING ROOM IS.

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